Why Don't I Care About the NYC Marathon Anymore?

In a moment of stupidity, I signed up for the lottery for the NYC Marathon. Even worse, my boyfriend (who has a half PR faster than me) agreed to pace me in the Brooklyn Half to qualify me in case I didn't make it.

But now, waiting for the results of the lottery,

I don't want to get in.

It seems sacrilegious; the NYC Marathon used to be my favourite race. Yes, it used to be. But now, I prefer trails. I prefer the chill helpful amazingly fun kind community of ultrarunning. I prefer to spend much less on a race - for four times as much distance. I prefer the beauty I see in nature. I also don't like road running, don't like the "OMG I was off by three seconds per mile!", don't like the energy, the vibe as much. Of course b/c it's NYC, it's a blast - the people are what makes it awesome (the crowds of diverse people, the music...). But honestly, if I get my choice, it's Pinhoti.

But if I get in...the entry fee is more than any race I've ever done. To throw it away...no, I'll just instead run it in a tutu as a speed workout for whichever 100 I want to do! 

My backup 100 choices are:

• Cajun Coyote, which I did last year and loved, mainly b/c the RDs and volunteers were freaking SO MUCH FUN!
• Chimera 100 Miler, which is supposed to be hard but beautiful!