What if there were no more offices? What if there were no more office jobs ever, no more offices ever again? What would you do???
Yesterday, it was beautiful. 65. and there i was, typing things into an excel spreadsheet, emailing obsessively, editing venessa's brilliant story. (okay so i'm often left with not much to do at work.) sitting at my little desk, looking out the window next to me...god it was beautiful! were people walking around in bikinis? okay maybe not that but it was gorgeous.
i get off work. i have a headache, bleary-eyed from staring at a computer for eight hours. it's wonderful. hot. f*ck my winter coat. it's beautiful.
i run in my house, nudge luna away from me as she meows for food. (this cat can stand some exercise, too!) "later, wait a bit sweetie," i tell her, slipping into a tank top/sports bra and the appropriate spandex short shorts. sunglasses. sweatband. and i'm gone.
i run up franklin, to oak, over to berry, down and make a left on metropolitan, run down roebling, where i pass a fellow runner, "hello." run fast, hit mccarren park and feel good. lie down on the side of the track and begin stretching.
the runner comes next to me. we begin chatting. awkwardly.
"oh it's so good to be outside. after being at work all day. the office."
"definitely...so hard to be in work when it's like this."
we get chatting, she works for a publishing co. we talk abt how our jobs rob us of our time. "i was thinking," i tell her, "that it's crazy how we go to work and don't have enough time to do what we want to do, and i think there is absolutely no way i can live the rest of my life like this."
we begin running. she asks me, "what would you do if there were no offices? no office jobs?"
"yes. no office jobs. no such thing as offices. you could do anything else. be a nurse, a gardener, a janitor, a bartender. what would you do?"
"work in an academic library...that's what i want to do."
"no. no libraries."
i think. "i want to write...but that isn't paying the bills yet. umm...ummm....i'd be a track coach."
"so be a track coach."
"i can't with my job now. and more school it probably requires."
she says she would work with children and paint.
i realize how trapped i have been feeling lately. like i'm going nowhere. eventually, after i get my MLS i can become a REAL LIBRARIAN. but lately, with not having benefits or anything ("we're not real people," liz always says to me, another "temp" librarian who has yet to be hired. my boss says, "i don't get this. they can hire 1600 consultants but I have to jump thru flaming hoops to get a part-time librarian (liz) and a junior librarian (me) hired.") i think the white paper corporate bullshit is really turning me off from wanting to stay there.
i'm sending out resumes. i'm hoping someone buys my book. i just want to write all day, is that too much to ask.
it'd be awesome if trev did get a job in another country that paid well and i wouldn't be able to work--i could write all day. but honestly, the city inspires me and i want to stay here for a while.
my ideal day would be:
wake up leisurely (no alarms!)
go running for an hour or so
indulge in stretching while drinking gatorade
shower and eat
write for a few hours
meet a friend at a cafe; discuss books and our writing
go to my writer's group and critique each other's work
go home and meet my lovey for dinner, maybe wash some dishes or something domestic like that (okay that's a bit of realism eh?)
and read before bed. (i know other people watch tv, yuck, i read yay!)
so how can i accomplish this?
i don't want to dream anymore. i'll take something else; i just don't want to be trapped.
i wish there were no more offices.