31 January 2007


Sometimes, I think religion is to blame for many of the evils in the world. I just saw a thing on the BBC about a terror plot foiled—apparently, these individuals planned on beheading a British Muslim soldier and posting a video of it on the Internet. Today, when I was running in Greenpoint (Greenpoint has traditionally been a very Polish, thus, white neighborhood), several cars had swastikas and anti-Semitic comments and symbols drawn in the snow on the hood of the car. I was so angry and did my best to wipe them out, and was not struck by the irony of anti-Semitic comments followed by, “Jesus loves everyone.” Yeah, everyone except you, you hateful jerk, is what I thought.

Reminds me of the bumper sticker my mom loves, "Jesus may love you but everyone else thinks you're an asshole."

22 January 2007

sunday's half-marathon

so i ran the coldest race i have ever run before on sunday: a half-marathon in central park. i know, sounds fun? at the start, it was 20 F (feels like 7F!) and i was literally crying. it was that cold. my hands and my toes hurt so much. my feet started to thaw out after the first four or five miles, but it was such a miserable race. while running, i realized i was running way slow, and told myself it was okay. honestly, i haven't been training that hardcore lately, just starting to get back into things. and because i was crying in the beginning of the race, i told myself, "this is just a training run, not a race. a run." as long as i finished sub-two hours, i'd be happy.

if you're wondering, how bad was it, here's how bad:
  • there was black ice all over the course, mostly by the water stops
  • when you got to a fluid station, instead of grabbing a cup of water, you'd grab a cup of solid ice. this happened to be on several occasions.
  • my fingers hurt with the cold the entire race.
  • when i peed around mile 8 (i had to go!), steam rose up in the porta-potty after i peed!
so i finished in sub-two hours, to trev cheering me on, "hurry up, let's get pancakes." after, mark and mark and trevor and i got hot cocoa and then mexican food "that you don't need a wheelbarrow to take you home afterwards" and i spent the rest of the day warm--hot shower, warm apartment with candles burning, lots of tea, moving-watching under the blanket. i hate the cold. training for a spring marathon is hell, i'm slowly learning.

17 January 2007

i keep checking the weather forecast...

as if suddenly weather.com is going to reveal to me it's spring. *sigh* i must be patient.

15 January 2007

why i'm anti-car

i ride in trains, buses, cabs, and yes, sometimes even cars. (the overly-anal out there will try to point out that cabs are cars, but this is nyc, baby, they're magical! ha!) i understand that for some people (like my darling crista), cars are a necessity in your life. the grocery store is five miles away, there is no easily accessible public transport system where you live, you have a disability and a car allows you to get around, you work 70 miles from where you live (and you are not moving from where you live because your honey cannot move or whatever!) and you need to drive, whatever--i understand you have your reason for driving.

now here's some of my reasons for NOT driving!
  • environmental destruction. cars produce heaps of pollution.
  • oil. oil equals the reason we're in iraq, the reason chevron and others have destroyed huge sections of the rainforest and alaska and too many other places.
  • people drive like morons. the less i drive, the less i have to be around morons.
  • i don't want to drive. i can't picture myself hopping into my ugly little (or big, gas-guzzling car) car every day to drive to work, deal with snarls of traffic. i like walking, running, riding my bike, taking the train, and even the bus, much more. these are also all methods i use for getting around.
  • i hate the way people can't seem to walk five minutes or ten minutes. they complain about being overweight but then won't walk to the deli 3 blocks away. they drive. this seems to be a very american thing, from what i've seen.
  • i like being able to read on my commute. right now, i'm reading we don't need another wave and news of a kidnapping. i recommend both.
  • i don't want to be another driver. i don't want my commute or my transport to be causing excess environmental damage. yes, i know, buses and trains are not super friendly, but it's MUCH better for me to cram on a bus with 50 other people than me to get in my car and drive behind 49 other cars with 1 person in them each.
  • um, i've forgotten how to drive. i haven't driven in over 2.5 years and i honestly forget which is the gas and which is the brake. seriously.

for v and w, who are also carless by choice. i'm sick of defending my decision to never want to own a car. perhaps this will change someday, but i hope not.

be a smart pedestrian

i'm a pedestrian, and i never want to own a car. that said, stupid non-car-drivers really piss me off. well, it's more like i'm annoyed at their stupidity which is extremely dangerous to them. please, don't do these things unless you want to die:

1. run in the street with headphones on.
um, you can't hear the cars and you're in the street. first off, why do you need to be in the street. yes, i run in the street when crossing or if the sidewalk is closed off (but i run to the other side generally), but there's no reason to run in the potholed streets of nyc. but to do this with headphones--you're in car territory, and if you can't hear them, you may get hit. and you may die.

2. ride a bike on the sidewalk.
in nyc, the rule is: you ride in the road. if there isn't a bike lane, you get to take an entire lane. (okay, car drivers in nyc, you hear this? stop honking, i know you're there, and i ride towards the side but i'm not gonna pull over and stop. honking makes me nervous, and i could fall and get smushed and then you'll have to go to jail for involuntary humanslaughter, or whatever they call it.) so don't ride on the sidewalk when people are running, walking, etc. generally, there's not enough room!

3. ride without a helmet.
rachelle covered this in her blog a while ago, but if you get hit, and you fly off your bike, and smash your head, a helmet could save your life. if you want to die, though, by all means, ride helmetless. show off your hairdo in that case.

4. walk with your ipod blasting, completely oblivious to others around you.
(or whatever music device you use)
i admit, when that song comes on my ipod, i'll turn up the volume, start rocking it up, maybe dancing, mouthing the words, even singing. i rationalize that i'm entertaining and shocking all of the bored people in the financial district. BUT i try not to turn the volume up so much that i can't hear what's going on. (like in the bank, when they say, "next! NEXT! NEXT!" and that woman in front of you still doesn't move. you have to remember: i am out in public, and yes my music is making this tedious walk a bit more pleasant and even bearable, but you need to keep the volume low enough so you can hear things. (if you want to keep it at max, you'll prob destroy your ears and perhaps get smushed by a car.)
saturday i was running fairly fast on the sidewalk outside central park, at mile 14 or 15 of an 18 or 19 miler, feeling like i wanted to hurt someone and wanting some waffles, no more power gels or energy jelly beans, when this guy in front of me was walking down the sidewalk, hogging it. "excuse me!" i shouted. he did not turn around or move. "EXCUSE ME! PARDON!" and still he did not move. and i'm pretty loud. finally, "EXCUSE ME!" as i'm running past him--which is the point at which he decides, "i think i'll randomly move over." so i ran into him. he was a pissed off tourist and i shouted at him (could he hear me over his ipod?) and he started yelling at me in a foreign language (i was shouting so i didn't get a real sense of it--something eastern european, but not polish because i know that so easily, living in greenpoint) and i yelled back, including, "i hate tourists!" he was a tourist (you can tell, especially with this damaged-hearing person) and i was so frustrated.

and i'm not saying i'm perfect. this is my blog and my space to offer a bitchfest to the world, and i'm merely voicing my opinions. i listen to music too loud and sing too loud and i cut across the street (jaywalk) when i probably shouldn't, but i try to keep as smart as possible and generally don't allow anything stupid to become a habit.

the main thing i'm sick of

years ago, a good friend of mine suddenly broke her lease, mid-month. she had a dirt-cheap apartment in washington heights--this was several years ago but it was something ridiculously like $500 or $700 for a 1 bedroom. really nice. the reason she broke her lease? "i couldn't stand being sexually harassed every single day. i never could leave my house without hearing shouting. i stopped wearing revealing outfits, heels and skirts. it was so bad. i just couldn't take it."

i've been getting really frustrated with some of these jerks in my neighborhood. no, not the hipsters that are raising the rents. well, yeah, i'm frustrated at them too, but i'm frustrated by these certain men. elsewhere in my hood it's fine, but they seem to congregate in this ten block or so radius--the ten blocks closest to me that i pass whenever i go to my health food store, train, anywhere basically i want to go. to escape my house, i must pass these jerks.

they see me daily but still, they must stare and leer. if i wear a short skirt, or have my hair down, or wear my big hoops, or more makeup, or even, if i'm simply well-covered up, they say stuff to me. they hang out all along the main strip, but especially in front of this one loser's deli (#1 reason to never, ever shop there), harassing every woman that goes by. there is this one jerk i especially loathe that i want to throw up on. he has children yet likes to say revolting things to women as they walk past--when his kiddies are away.

basically, i'm frustrated. i understand why my friend broke her lease and lost her apartment. i'm starting to get incredibly frustrated with these men and want to just feel comfortable walking down the street. i may move but i may not but for now, i dream of a world where i am free.

one tree grew in brooklyn

this is sad, but amuses me...my block is so sparse of trees (there are several at the far end of the block, and then one in front of my house, followed by a few more), that when i give cabbies directions i'll say, "my house is three-quarters of the way up the block, the one with that tree in front of it."

where i used to live--in southern brooklyn--we had trees. prospect park was a paradise. i tried to convince a friend from colorado that there were trees. "oh, i know what you meant," he said. " there was a book. a tree grows in brooklyn. it didn't say, 'many trees grow in brooklyn.' a tree. so i guess you have seen that one tree." ha-ha, seanne.

10 January 2007

from a story i wrote a while ago (i love this line!)

I went horseback riding last year and it occurred to me I didn’t need anything from Vin.

03 January 2007

the savages: my version of a book review

i just finished reading joe kane's THE SAVAGES today. it's the story of the huaorani and their fight against the oil companies that are ruining great expanses of the amazon. when i finished it today, tears were in my eyes (and i was on the train, so i'm sure i looked bizarre, but that ought to tell you how powerful it was) and i am so glad i don't own a car. oil is dirty, dirty business, and the way that the oil companies have ruined the lives, health, and civilization of these people disgusts me.

01 January 2007

what was 2006

before i go congratulating everyone on HAPPY NEW YEAR 2007, i thought i'd do a little thinking about my 2006 (prompted by an email from steve).

my 2006 was full of a lot of changes:
  • lost a long-term temp job with one-day's notice when the assignment was up
  • quit my job at the technical college
  • started working at the amazing nonprofit i currently work at
  • went to boulder for a long weekend to see many old treasured friends
  • went to london for andrew and john's wedding
  • spent a lovely summer in nyc with heaps of free concerts, free shows, and so much fun!
  • went to the beach as many times as possible
  • became a better knitter
  • ran the nyc marathon with a personal best of 3:51
  • decided to start running more marathons
  • realized my family is totally crazy and i'm spending holidays away from them
  • turned 27
  • realized what my priorities are in life: my happiness, my health (go organic foods!), my running, my cat, my traveling, my writing
and the list goes on. most importantly, 2006 was a year of self-reflection. i broke up with my boyfriend, thought a lot about how he treated me and what i want. i realized that traveling is something that is a lifestyle to me. now, i'm in the perpetual state of confusion, but when at least that exists, you know you can just go with the flow.

and now...