Winter Misery Land

Some people love winter. They love snow, they love skiing, they love the cold.

I am not one of those people.

I hate the cold. I hate snow and ice. I hate winter. I don't like skiing - I've never tried it but I know I won't like it because it's in the cold. Ever since I got frostbite nearly three years ago, I especially hate running in the cold. My feet turn numb and everything becomes painfully cold rather fast - within an hour - so racing in the north during cold temperatures are pretty impossible.

I missed the "Polar Vortex" of cold in NYC when I was in Colombia, but we've still had some cold temperatures. And snow. And ice. And yes, NYC normally gets some of it, but not all of it at once, and in such a miserable way.

My training has gone to hell. I hate the treadmill and don't understand how some of my friends can do things like set records and run for 12 hours on a treadmill. I'd rather run 24 hours outdoors. As much as I hate the cold, I curse the treadmill.

On the super cold days, I layered up. Dress tights, running tights, thick wool socks, a sports bra, t-shirt, three long-sleeved shirts, a running jacket, buff, hate, super warm mittens. I feel puffy and find running difficult. But I do it anyway. Slowly. Ugh.

Icy days are the ones I must head to the treadmill. I do a max of an hour on the treadmill (I tried 90 minutes and only made it 85), and then will hit up the rowing machine and the elliptical too. Time on your feet, I tell myself.

When I run outside, even when the sidewalks are clear and I'm running, I'll get to an intersection and there will be piles of snow that I'll have to slow down and navigate. Sometimes I'll run to McCarren Park where I can run mostly uninterrupted, as they plow that pretty well.

What can I do? I do the best I can. But right now, it's not enough. It's too miserable. I know there are many worse place to live (Alaska? Yukon? All those northern places where the snow keep falling in depths of FOUR FEET and schools are closed because "it's too cold.") for me - I'm sure they are lovely in summertime, but I really don't like winter. If I did adore NYC as much as I did, I would be out of here in a second. But still, I'm pondering escape routes from the cold.

Frostbitten

I've done some rather stupid things in my life: finish an ultramarathon in a lightning storm; dance for hours on end in skinny heels on stage at a club; think flip flops were an acceptable form of shoes to wear excessively; have my friend highlight my hair in college. But I think one of the stupidest things I've done is running the Febapple 50k.

It was just a training run. I could have done a training run in Central Park (but really, yawn, how many times can I run in that crowded urban oasis? And hello, concrete, you are not my friend and not what I race on!), but this would've been more fun. I got to see friends. I met some rad new women who I ran with. I was able to discover delicious combinations, like gummy bears and potato chips (heavenly!). And then I would never have pushed my limits to get my worst 50k time ever, but you know, it was kinda fun.

But the aftermath...during the race it was ridiculously cold, and my toes still haven't warmed up. They feel numb. I've soaked, massaged them, visited my doctor who massage, did reflexology, and examined them. They're messed up. They'll be fine eventually but now...now it feels weird. Like pins and needles all the time. Like I am always kinda numb. Like I've been wearing high heels while walking all over all day - but without the pain, just the numbness. It's awful.

The problem was the snow and the cold and especially, all the wet puddles I continuously stepped in. I stepped in a puddle in the first few minutes, and didn't even take off my wet shoes right away post-race. I estimate wearing the wet sneakers for at least 11 hours.

I should've quit, but I don't know how.

My doctor warned me I'll have increase sensitivity to cold, and I have to be extra careful in the future or I'll get frostbite again. It's a fairly mild case (no toes will be lost, though we can't guarantee toenails, but of course, that's another story!). It's a journey to good health always, which would be easier if I wasn't kicking my butt all the time with these crazy runs - but then what would be the point of life if it was easy?

I'm off to soak my foot in Chinese herbs with a scent I loathe - foot stew!

ridiculous cold winter

it was fourteen, feels like four, with 40-45 mph wind gusts when i left my house to go running. despite being bundled up, i was freezing. i ran through greenpoint, williamsburg, bed-stuy, crown heights. people stared at me; is she really running? is she crazy? i must've seemed really hot since i got a bunch of yells, cheers, and honks. oh yeah, baby, ski mask sexy.

running in nyc

on friday, i thought i'd do at least 30-40 miles, but that wasn't in the plans. sometimes, you need to listen to your body. my head and overall body felt disoriented; i think it was electrolyte deficiency, and i was taking endurolytes, but apparently, not enough. i only ran 23 or 24 mile, but had some good times. i saw some pretty amazing street scenes in chinatown, the kind of scenes that make you think you are in a foreign country. today i ran 15 miles and have spent the rest of the day doing stuff for work (ugh) and knitting and chilling with t. tomorrow i'm volunteering at a 5ok and a wintry mix (the dreaded wintry mix!) is predicted. spring can't come soon enough!

i cannot take this weather anymore

i know compared to some areas of the country (the midwest, buffalo), i have nothing to complain abt. but i'm so freaking sick of the sub-freezing temps, the snow, the ice. it's horrendous. i'm on the verge of crying, "let's just move to retirement central, t!" and live in my parents' retirement condo in florida. seriously, it's so freaking cold, it's depressing, i've eaten soup more times since i've been back that it's nearly every meal (with oatmeal for breakfast), and running in the snow and ice is so sad and cold. i want to experience WARMTH. if new york city didn't have winter, it would be the perfect place to live. seriously.

sunday's half-marathon

so i ran the coldest race i have ever run before on sunday: a half-marathon in central park. i know, sounds fun? at the start, it was 20 F (feels like 7F!) and i was literally crying. it was that cold. my hands and my toes hurt so much. my feet started to thaw out after the first four or five miles, but it was such a miserable race. while running, i realized i was running way slow, and told myself it was okay. honestly, i haven't been training that hardcore lately, just starting to get back into things. and because i was crying in the beginning of the race, i told myself, "this is just a training run, not a race. a run." as long as i finished sub-two hours, i'd be happy.

if you're wondering, how bad was it, here's how bad:

• there was black ice all over the course, mostly by the water stops
• when you got to a fluid station, instead of grabbing a cup of water, you'd grab a cup of solid ice. this happened to be on several occasions.
• my fingers hurt with the cold the entire race.
• when i peed around mile 8 (i had to go!), steam rose up in the porta-potty after i peed!

so i finished in sub-two hours, to trev cheering me on, "hurry up, let's get pancakes." after, mark and mark and trevor and i got hot cocoa and then mexican food "that you don't need a wheelbarrow to take you home afterwards" and i spent the rest of the day warm--hot shower, warm apartment with candles burning, lots of tea, moving-watching under the blanket. i hate the cold. training for a spring marathon is hell, i'm slowly learning.

i keep checking the weather forecast...

as if suddenly weather.com is going to reveal to me it's spring. *sigh* i must be patient.