12 October 2010

Being Pretty Is Not A Crime

I hate when, after a pretty woman complains about being harassed/hit on, people respond, "Well, you should feel flattered." Or, "You won't get it forever - and then you'll miss it."

Being pretty is not a crime. It should not make you a victim. I'm sick of the attitude that because a woman is pretty, she is there for male delight or gawking or being treated a certain way (i.e., as if she is not smart, a sex object, whatever).

Nothing wrong with looking good. I wear heels, eye makeup. But there's more than prettiness.

This post is really what inspired me to write about this, especially this: 

You Don't Have to Be Pretty. You don't owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, especially not to random men on the street. You don't owe it to your mother, you don't owe it to your children, you don't owe it to civilization in general. Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked "female". 

UPDATE 10/13/2010: Reading Feministing today, I saw a great post, Why Do Strange Men Touch Me. I have had this happen to me before - ugh. Chloe says,
 
"He wanted to touch me, so I was going to be touched, by a stranger, whether I wanted it or not. What he wanted was more important than what I wanted, because he is a man, and I am a woman. Did he consider that his words and his gesture, perhaps intended to compliment, might mean something totally different to me? If he did, that didn’t stop him. What he wanted was more important than what I wanted, perhaps because we live in a world where what men want is more important than what women want. That is why strange men think they’re allowed to touch me – and any other women they feel like touching. It’s that simple."

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