revelations at work

everyone at my job thinks i'm an optimist. an optimist or a hippie.
i'm neither, but compared to the all-black wearing look on the dark
side of things, stressing over every little email and memo--what's
the point? is this my life? no, it's merely a period of time where
i'm working at a job that isn't perfect. is there a perfect job?
probably not. even if i'm working at an academic library, chances
are i'll have a stalking patron or a psycho coworker or a long
commute or whatever--nothing is perfect, and bouncing around from
job to job won't solve that either. paychecks are a good thing,
though.

i have been thinking a lot about how our society exists--there's a
lot of anti-capitalism energy, yet i'm not sure what the solution
would be. is canada heaven? switzerland? where is the perfect
society? then you think about it, all that snow in canada, and in
switzerland those hidden explosives in the road creep me out. (do we
have those in the USA?)

i hate the point of view that if you're anti-bush or anti-bush
administration, you're unpatriotic. right now i am not a fan of the
USA at all, and would not call myself patriotic. i love many things
about new york city, and never want to leave. but the inequality of
the USA is disturbing. but is that everything? although, no matter
how poor you are, in canada or the uk, you can go to a doctor. i pay
my own health insurance, and truly value it. i'm glad, and i go to
the doctor when i'm sick or when i need to. i hope whatever job i
have next will offer me health insurance, and even then, i plan on
always looking on the bright side.