Umstead 100: 22:32: Race Report

"An easy 100," I've heard said of Umstead before. I don't think there is such a thing, but Umstead is easier in terms of 100s - the course is 12.5miles long, and you run it 8 times. There are two big aid stations where you can have drop bags and there is quite an array of a variety of food (baked potatoes, pretzels, m&ms, oranges, cantaloupe, hot dogs, pizza, hot cocoa, soups, potato chips, animal crackers, I can go on and on...), so with these two logistical issues taken care of, the 100 becomes *slightly* easier. There's also several intermediary aid stations I usually skipped that just had water and gatorade (some with a little bit more) and usually no volunteers. The footing is quite good (nothing technical) and while the loops can become a little boring...but it's a good race if you love to run. That makes it "easy" too.

The course has some flats, some steeper hills, some rolling hills - nothing too awful, but when you're feeling like death later in the race, it's hard to motivate yourself to do anything but walk up the minor hills.

The pre-race meeting was too long and boring, and I felt bad for my poor sister and her husband (They put up a lot this weekend!) so we snuck out early to head back to their place to eat pasta. I ended up falling asleep around 8:30, and woke up around 3:30 when my parents arrived at my sister's.

The start was fun. My mom, sister, and Brian were a little overwhelmed by the start ("Why do these people need coolers?" "What are they wearing?" "That's what they're leaving at the aid station?" etc.), and quite underwhelmed by the start (One second, I was chatting about where to buy running skirts, the next I was running!).

Lap 1:
I felt pretty good. I went out strong, was happy, and warmed up quickly. (It was in the 30s when we started.) I ran with Tony for a while, scaring myself. (He's a quite bit faster than I.) I felt good though, quite comfortable. (About 2hr16minpace)

Lap 2:
I chased after Tony and kept up on my pace. I met new friends. One of the greatest things about the course is you can see people (like Paul, Shannon, Steve Tursi, and many others) in multiple points -- there's an out and back each time to the main aid station, and another on the "airport spur." It made for a very friendly ultra, with almost a party-like atmosphere. Lap two I continued to feel great. My sister, father, and Brian were at the HQ aid station again (and the intermediary) and brought me some bottled water - the water had a funny taste (which others have remarked on as well). (About 2:20 pace or so)

Lap 3:
Felt great still. Just enjoying the race, the day. Tony was a bit ahead of me and I wanted to catch him, but didn't want to burn myself out. Felt strong. (About 2:20 pace or so) 

Lap 4:
The first half I started to feel really hungry. I had eaten a gel but needed solid food. When I got to the middle aid station, feeling famished, I gorged on pretzels and M&Ms. I learned a very powerful lesson a half mile later: too many M&Ms in too short a time can result in nausea. I ended up clutching my stomach, pausing to dry heave. People passed me, all inquiring (I was bent over, holding my stomach, walking a lot) and one woman paused to help me, giving me Tums. They were magic. (Note to self: carry Tums on every ultra from now on!) I felt a lot better...until my stomach began hurting in a different way - and let's say that a half mile to a portapotty can be too far and I was so glad I had immodium. I lost A LOT of time and felt awful - I was soaked with sweat from illness and this messed my stomach and appetite up a lot.

This one guy passed me and said to me, "You know, you can still do sub-24 if you push yourself." I was walking, feeling horrid and said, "My stomach hurts SO bad." (I was literally moaning to myself b/c I was in so much pain.) He said, 

"If you're gonna walk, walk like you mean it. You can whine when it's over."


That kicked something in me. I ran until I had to run behind a tree to go to the bathroom.


This phrase echoed in my head anytime things got tough.

Lap 5:
When I got back to HQ aid station before starting, I took medicine, drank ginger ale, and ate some pretzels. Some random crew person helped me (I LOVE the runners, pacers, crew, and volunteer at ultras; they always go above and beyond helping, way beyond anything that would happen in a road race).  

I kicked it up. I picked up the pace where I left off, pushing, pushing, passing people who had passed me. "You look great!" "Someone looks a lot better." It was such a welcoming and nice environment and I felt so great and happy and SO much better.

Lap 6:
Pacer time! My little sister met me, all ready to go. I drank some coconut water (mmmm, Zico!), took more endurolytes, and ate pretzels. The rest of the race, due to my messed up stomach, I stuck to a steady diet of pretzels, animal crackers, and Power Gel Bursts. I also took a 5 hour Energy Shot, which helped keep me awake.

I also changed my shoes to a half-size bigger - this helped my swollen feet have room to spread out, and I highly recommend this to anyone running a 100 miler. I also changed my bra and tank top and put on a long sleeved and a pair of gloves.

It got dark slightly before we hit the second aid station, and my sister somehow figured out how to break the head lamp (just kidding, but it did disassemble) and we had to figure it out. The moon was full and some people opted for no head lamp, but I found it mostly helped. I still felt pretty good.

My sister carried my fuel belt which helped lighten things up for me - every little thing like that is always nice!

Lap 7:
I had never met Kelsey before, but she volunteered to pace me. She was fantastic and I couldn't have asked for a better stranger to become my friend during the course of pacing me. She was sweet, funny, interesting, motivating, smart, and a great runner. I was struggling a lot, and Kelsey tried to get me to eat. I tried to eat crusts of white bread. The promise land of pancakes never materialized, despite promises from the RD that there would be pancakes. (Apparently they were made WAY after I finished running, Boooo!) I was a little out of it, swaying and shivering, and Kelsey pushed me. I struggled hard as my time dropped.

Lap 8:
Ow. My feet hurt so bad. At one point, I said something like, "I'm running like a little old lady in high heels." Step, step, step. I think when I was running hard on lap 5, trying to make up for lost time, I ran too hard on some of the downhills...and my quads were reminding me on laps 6, 7, and 8 what happens when you do that.

The first 7 miles of this lap were awful. We walked a lot as Kelsey engaged me in various conversations. When we got to the final aid station, happiness surrounded me but I knew I needed to get something in me or it would last even longer. I opted for hot chocolate, made from a mix, something I'd normally snub but that really helped me. Kelsey encouraged me to eat and I stuffed animal crackers into my pockets to eat during the final miles.

The hot cocoa really warmed me up. I pushed, pushed, pushed as much as I possibly could, running more, feeling good.

And then - then it was over! Down a hill, up a hill - and to my sister, mom, and Brian screaming. It felt great! 55 overall -- and over 220 starters. Wow! A PR of over 6 1/2 hours!


What would I do differently?

• Not eat so many M&Ms at once
• Get my mom to bring me pancakes
• Figure out other food that works for my stomach (and bring more Powergel bursts)
• Pack bottled water for next year's Umstead

I think that's pretty much it. I ran as hard as I could - and I'm so pleased.

Now - next goals...I would love to break 20 hours! Hah!
 

A thought that struck me today that's getting me through the day...

Sometimes the things you're not supposed to do are the things you need to do.

umstead 100: quick update

So I did it! I broke the 24 hour 100 mile barrier and ran Umstead 100 Miler in 22:32. I'm sore, exhausted, but so full of life.

Full race report coming soon!

P.S. I think I like 100 milers a lot more now...!

Umstead 100

This is it - off to JFK to catch my flight to Umstead 100 Miler!!!

The One

You may think 

I'm the one

and yes I am

but not for you.

A 50k a Day (Part II): Volunteering at the Caumsett 50k

Iliana has become my ultrarunning partner in crime lately. We email about ultrarunning, talk about it, run long runs together, plot races together. Our vacation time in the next two years has been getting planned out around races. We both have no money due to our expensive ultrarunning habits. It's all worth it, though.

So when Iliana asked me if I'd volunteer at the Caumsett 50k (which I did last year), I said, "Of course." I had a blast volunteering at the race - the race directors were nice, the fellow volunteers hilarious, and I really liked giving back and helping out other ultrarunners. I didn't need volunteer credit, I told her - but of course changed my mind about needing that credit. I will most likely be running the Vermont 100 again - it was so much fun last year, how can I not run it again?

We got to the race at 7:30 and began setting up the aid station with food. Blaming it on the fact that it looks like poo and she did not grow up in the U.S., Iliana left me to spreading peanut butter (though she did spread jelly on some of the sandwiches). We poured snacks into trays, poured cups of water and Gatorade, sliced bananas, made more sandwiches, cut more bananas, handed cups of water, cheered people on, gave people Ibuprofin. It was a blast!

It's also nice to not be in pain and just be chilling and cheering on others. Because I know how much hard work goes into each and every run, I tried to pump up the runners. 

Iliana got into a great system of handing water and drinks to the runners. She got to know the runners, and would call me, "Cherie! Michael Wardian!" That meant two cups of water. Jill Perry? That meant a cup of coke and a Gatorade. Iliana knew everyone's drink preference - after 10 laps, she was a true expert. I may as well slathered my body with peanut butter and jelly in my sandwich creation, but I had a blast.

I knew a lot of the people out there. I got to see the lovely Scott Dunlap (Funny - I saw him, knew I knew him somehow, asked him, and then realized he writes one of my fave blogs, A Trail Runner's Blog), Tony, Steve Tursi again, and others. They were all running and I wished I was running too - but was glad I was helping out.

When it came time for Tony's final lap, Iliana and I began running with him. Iliana ran ahead to pace a doctor on her final lap, and I kept pace with Tony, trying to do my best to cheer him up. I kept chatting about Umstead, races, random things, trying to perk him up. He seemed cheered as he pulled into the finish.

Then, Iliana and I ran with the infamous Ray K from the Ultra list. ("I love his posts," Iliana confided in me.) He shared all sorts of great wisdom, advice, running tips, racing reports. I'm excited that he'll be at Umstead, and he might even have time to run a lap with me (which sounds even better, especially after my pacer AKA little sister's email of this morning complaining that her hip flexor is bothering her).

After we finished volunteering, Iliana and I headed for a long run ourselves. It was getting dark and cold and we explored the trails as much as we could during the daylight. We looped around the pavement, avoiding oblivious children on out-of-control tricycles and old men on wobbly bicycles. 

After the run, we piled back into Iliana's car to finish the Banana Oat Choc Chip bars I had made, drink some water, and say goodbye to a weekend of fun 50ks.

A 50k a Day...(Seneca Trails 50k Race Report)

I have no willpower. Seriously. Especially when it comes to running. Iliana asked me if I wanted to do the Seneca Trail 50k: "It's only $20." And into my training plan. And it was trails. And it sounded fun. And it was running!

So of course I signed up.

The race was cold at the start - just around freezing. I was shivering in a pair of running tights, gloves, my long sleeved running zip up, hat, and yes, hand warmers. We shivered around a registration area utilizing free heat sheets and hand warmers, and the RD encouraged us to use bag balm on our feet - "because your feet will be wet the whole time." Um, I guess I missed the wet factor when skimming the course description...

We started off on a slippery asphalt path, and I slowed down, worrying about ice. I'm a big fraidy cat when it comes to ice, but luckily, it was fairly minimal throughout the race. Most of the race was on trails which were often quite slippery due to snow and mud.

I found myself enjoying the snow and the sunshine, and warmed up after about two miles. I kept my eyes on the path, unwilling to slip down into the creek (which yes, I almost did on more than one occasion), but the scenery was quite lovely (though winter-like). I was not pushing it, as I didn't wish to race this (Umstead 100 is just in three weeks, eeek!) but pushed myself mentally to keep up with certain people and not fall behind.

The trails were fairly flat with some rolling small hills. They were mostly single track and highly enjoyable. There were a few spots with creek crossings - including one where you had to hold onto a rope. That first creek crossing was a bit of a shock - I had no idea there would be creek crossings (mostly ankle high water, but occasionally, mid-calf).  I couldn't help laughing as I crossed - there was just no way to avoid the water, so I tried to embrace. Squish, squish, for the next few minutes after exiting the creek.

The race volunteers were cheerful and had great aid stations (featuring delicious homemade oatmeal cookies!) and cute signs. The aid station at 28 had the theme of "Goldfish" and signs throughout the race talked about goldfish (like "Believe in the Goldfish") and when we finally got to "The Aquarium" we got to chow down on goldfish, yummy homemade treats, pretzels, oh and so many wonderful treats!

It's nice how mellow a 50k feels, especially a "local" one like this. 50 milers are fun but you're aware that there's a lot of work ahead. 50ks feel quick, I guess because I will sometimes do 50k or more as a training run. This was a fun training run with great trails, nice volunteers, and a chance to meet new running friends (and exchange running stories).

I ran the final 10 miles or so with Bekkie and Joe of the Silk City Striders, and chatted with them about the Vermont 100, Massanutten attempts, ultrarunning, life, the usual.

I felt great, running strong at the end. I finished, and immediately was presented with more delicious oatmeal cookies (Yes, ultrarunning will get you fat for the aid stations can more than replenish your lost calories!). We walked to a meat-heavy picnic (RDs, can't you be more like Ann Trason and make your race vegetarian-friendly? The post-Dick Collins 50 Miler BBQ was the absolute best post-race food I ever enjoyed...), ate more oatmeal cookies (Did I ever mention oatmeal cookies, especially good ones, are my fave cookie ever?), and left having met new friends, a great run under my belt, and a feeling of euphoria over my body.

If I ended up getting married...

Chances are, my spouse would serve me with a divorce, for reasons similar to this.

Packing List for Umstead 100 Miler

Because I don't want to forget anything (I'll have houseguests the week prior to Umstead and my work conference, so I'll likely be packing days in advance), I already made a packing list for the Umstead 100 Miler. (Okay, so I was bored in a meeting the other day...)

• 3 sports bras
• 3 tank tops
• 3 running skirts
• 3 pairs of underwear
• 6 pairs of socks
• 2 sneakers
• rain jacket
• thin long-sleeved shirt
• warmer running shirt
• running tights
• two visors
• 2-3 pairs of gloves
• sunscreen
• baby wipes
• body glide 
• pack of tissues
• foradil (asthma medicine)
• albuertol (asthma medicine)
• 15-20 gels
• 2 sports chews (power gel strawberry blasts)
• 4 sports beans
• 30 endurolytes
• gaiters
• velcro for gaiters
• 2 water bottles
• fun-sized snickers bars
• 2 5-hour energy shot
• ziploc
• sunglasses
• headlamps (2)
• small flashlight
• extra batteries
• advil
• immodium
• ginger candies
• for post race: sandals, fleece socks, comfy pants, warm hoodie, clean undies, t-shirt

Did I forget anything???

Because we all get hysterical after doing anything too long

I tend to freak out too; I remember yelling at mile 48 after an insanely hard hill at the Bear Mountain 50 Miler, "Don't tell me I look good! I don't look good! I look horrible and I feel horrible."

Sorry, volunteers. I was a little...ultra-d out at the time.



I know it's a commercial but I think it's hilarious.

Weekend of Running

My weekend was very rewarding in a physical sense - full of amazing runs!

Saturday I met Iliana to do a long run in Central Park. We originally intended to run long with Tony, but icy roads everywhere kept us in the plowed Central Park. I felt quite good, and Iliana wanted to stop after a little over two loops, and taking it easy was probably smart, esp. since we had an overnight run planned. Running loops in Central Park was better than I expected; we had good conversation, Iliana is very patient with my ice fears, and I ran into three running friends in the Park.

I spent the rest of the day getting my hair cut, doing errands, walking around. Iliana picked me up at seven for our journey to Jersey. The original plan was to run 40 miles point-to-point on the Paulinskill 100 Miler course - which will be Iliana's first 100 miler. However, two feet of snow was going to make that difficult, so we opted to run on the South Mountain Reservation (where I ran last May's and will run this May's South Mountain 100k). 

Iliana, Rick (the RD for Paulinskill, Watchung, Muddy Marathon, and many other local races), Tom (also running Paulinskill), and I began running across the snowy trails up to the top of the mountain. It was fairly challenging (esp with the snow), and I found myself laughing hysterically as I repeatedly slipped.

There was a long straight path where you could run covered with snow that led to a paved loop. The snowy path was slippery and challenging, so we mostly stuck to the paved loop.

Iliana was doing her 10min run-1min walk, and Tom began on the snowy path (until he realized how crazy it was) and Rick and I ran around the paved path. It was a lot of fun; the temperatures were fairly warm, I was feeling quite good, like I could run all night. The moon was full so we didn't even use our headlamps.

After a little over two hours, I must've stepped in a puddle. But wait, my legs were really wet and there were no puddles - what? Suddenly, my back, my legs were soaked. The straw fell out of my Nathan bladder and I was suddenly soaked. "Augh!" I screamed, pulling off my backpack.

I quickly evaluated the situation; I was totally and completely soaked. I could change my shirt, but my pants, underwear, socks were totally soaked. I let Rick go ahead, ran in the opposite direction on the loop until I found Iliana. Her piriformis and ITB were hurting, so she wanted to go to the car and just go to sleep.

We hiked all the way down to the car which was pretty miserable. I was completely soaked, hiking through snow. When we got to the car, with my teeth chattering, I wondered why I should even bother going back. I had an extra pair of pants, extra running jacket. I borrowed a sports bra and socks from Iliana; I didn't have underwear but figured I'd be fine.

When I got to the top, I was ready to run again. I was bummed at my problem, but felt fairly good. Rick and I ran together for a few more laps until he decided to leave. I said goodbye and then ran in the opposite direction until I found Tom. Just having met him that night, we easily chatted about races. He was quite interesting.

However, the lack of underwear was making me miserable. Let's just say I was experiencing some pretty horrid chafing. I finally had to stop, and Tom decided he'd leave as well. We hiked down the mountain together.

I probably would have stayed out a few more hours if I had been wearing underwear. Lesson learned? Pack extra underwear.

This morning I finished my weekend of run with a 2hr run, weight lifting, and a yoga for runners workshop. Now I'm ready for bed.

I can taste the fun I'll have at Umstead 100 Miler; I can't wait! 

Why I Run Ultras: Two Videos

Sometimes, between the bills and the subway being late and the snowfall and the annoyance with stinky, sweaty sports bras, I forget why I run.

These two videos remind me of why.




UltraRunning from Matt Hart on Vimeo.

Bigelow Tea Social

I feel bad because I never properly blogged about the wonderful Bigelow Tea Social I went to last month. It was a really fantastic night, and I was surprised at what a great time I had.



I'm a pretty big tea drinker. I like the ritual of it; the steeping, the pouring, the sweetening of tea. I love the whole process and enjoy every delicious moment. I hate getting tea on the go and drinking it out of a paper or styrofoam cup. I guess for that reason, that's why I like.

I'll be honest - I wouldn't say I was a dedicated Bigelow Tea drinker before the event. I have some really delicious high-quality loose tea, but when it goes for boxed tea, I have a few favourites:

•  Choice Organic Green Moroccan Mint Tea
• Traditional Medicinals Organic Raspberry Leaf
• Celestial Seasonings Candy Cane Lane 

I must admit, I've always been a big Celestial Seasonings fan, especially after I visited their tea factory in Boulder (which is actually a lot of fun; even my non-tea-drinking-at-the-time-ex-boyfriend loved it!). However, I learned a lot at the Bigelow (including at how Celestial Seasonings Teas are not tightly packed and won't last long), and how they tend to use tea crumbs instead of full leaves (which obviously have a fuller, richer flavour).

We started out the night chatting with Cindi Bigelow, the granddaughter of the founder. We had tea, and I tried the most amazing tea -- Constant Comment! I can't believe I never had this before, and must admit it's now one of my favorites! I also tried a Vanilla Tea, which while it was good, I went back to Constant Comment. (Yes, I had two cups of it!) There were also tea sandwiches (which I've never had before, and I must admit the cucumber and butter sandwiches were not as fab as I thought (I'm not the hugest butter person) but were quite dainty. The scones were phenomenal and I loved them.

We chatted about tea, about how we prepare it, the history of tea. Then we began to do some taste testing, trying different kinds of green tea, black tea, peppermint, chamomile. I was won over by the high quality of Bigelow Tea, especially with the richness of the flavours which greatly overshadowed the much weaker teas of their competitors. 

After, we had wine, chocolates, desserts, and of course, more tea. It was a truly lovely night.

We were sent home with various samples and a tea book. It was a really lovely night.

Pot at the End of the Umstead 100 Rainbow

Right now, I'm really focused on Umstead 100 Miler. I want to go sub 24 so bad I can taste it, but I also know it depends upon so many different things. If I'm having a good day, I KNOW I can do it. So many little things - chafing, blisters, upset stomach, electrolyte imbalance - turn into much bigger things in a 100 miler. I'm doing everything I can to be prepared - but the day of, we'll see what happens.

Using the sage advice of others on the ultra list, I have developed a plan to go sub 24.

I must run the first 50 miles in anywhere from 9 hours to 11:30 (depending on who you talk to). I'm hoping to do it in around 10ish.

The RD sent me an excellent race report that I've used to help develop my race plan. Each loop is 12.5 miles, and I need to run appropriately to finish in sub-24.

Lap 1: 2:20
Lap 2: 2:30 (Total time: 4:50)
Lap 3: 2:35 (Total time: 7:25)
Lap 4: 2:45 (Total time: 10:10)
Lap 5: 3:00 (Total time: 13:10)
Lap 6: 3:15 (Pick up pacer!) (Total time: 16:25)
Lap 7: 3:25 (Pacer!) (Total time: 19:50)
Lap 8: 3:40 (Pacer!) (Total time: 23:40!)

Obviously, it's going to be really tight, but I'm hoping I can make it.

The RD and others say if you want to finish sub-24, you need to bucket in enough extra time - so 10 hours for the first 50 miles, 13 for the next. Seeing as I've only gone sub-10 hours once in a 50 miler, I know it's going to be really, really tough. However, I have on my side:

• Intense training
• 5 Hour Energy Shots
• My mom, dad, and sister crewing me
• My sister pacing me for one loop (I wish she could do more because she's not afraid to beat the crap out of me when I need it but she's not an insane runner like me!)
• Kelsey pacing me for two loops (who is totally awesome!)

I can't stop thinking about Umstead...counting the moments down...it's going to be a blast, amazing, insane fun - and one of the toughest things I've ever done!

George Eliot Quote

It's never too late
to be what you
might have been.



Special thanks to Pomsey for filling my mailbox with this great quote and love on a day when all seems to be a giant stressball.

Race Report: Dances with Dirt 50 Miler: Green Swamp

I had an absolute blast in last Saturday's Dances with Dirt Green Swamp 50 Miler. At one point, kicking water in the air, running, laughing, I said to the other woman I was running with, "I'm having so much fun!"

Going into this race, my biggest worry was the negative consequences that could occur if I ran into an alligator. My brother had one when I was younger, but it was smaller and in a tank. What if I ran into an enormous alligator? Everyone warned me they ran very quickly and basically, they could eat me  quickly. 

My love for 50 milers convinced me to do this race, over my fear of alligators. I think they're the most fun distance! Marathons are way too fast and painful, 50ks are fun but you're just starting to get into things when they end, and 100 milers are WAY too longer. 100ks are also fun. But 50 milers - they're the perfect distance. They're short enough that you can do the run, eat a great big dinner, have a mellow night out even. I LOVE 50 milers.

I almost didn't get down to FL with the crazy snowstorm - my flight was canceled and I flew down to FL a day late. Even driving across Florida was stressful - I feel like I didn't fully relax until I started running.

Florida was struck by a cold wave. At the start, it was 34. I decided to go with my favorite pink running skirt, tank top, with my warm black running top from EMS on top, gloves, and pink visor. We all shivered in the tent by the start, warming up by the heater.

The 50 milers started at 5:30a.m. The first 8 miles or so were quite dark, so we ran with headlamps -- and consistently got lost. Miles 1-5 were white ribbons, and 5-10 were orange, and the orange were SO hard to see. Running in a big pack, we still got lost several times.

We started out running on fairly flat trails and sand. I was glad I wore my gaiters. We were all chatting with each other, and one guy was RUNNING AND SMOKING! He was a runner who also smoked cigarettes; so bizarre.

Around mile 3 or 4, we got to our first water section. There was no way around it, and it was a bit of a shock with the cold temperatures. We ran through it, complaining, and my shoes made that soggy sound for a while afterward.

I hooked up with a nice woman, Kim, and we ran together until Mile 23 (when I had to stop to pee, argh). She ended up winning the race - go Kim! We chatted a lot, exchanging ultra stories, talking about what we find attractive in a partner (Her boyfriend is an ultrarunner!), splashing through the mud.

The trails were often completely full of water, and we tried to avoid it (Hey, I wasn't taking any chances with the alligators) if it was easy; if not, we splashed right through. Because the trails were quite flat, we were able to run most of the course. I had a huge smile on my face and at one point said to Kim, "This is so much fun!" I was having a blast.

Some of the 50k runners and relay runners ended up blasting past, and I ran with some nice 50k runners for a while. The relay runners kept getting lost and missing the turnoffs. A lot of the time, I ran alone, which is fine with me. On beautiful trails, I don't need anything else. It's a test for me. It's my meditation. It's my happy time. It's the time when I'm my true whole self.

Around mile 24, I saw two hunters with very large guns. Guns frighten me, and I nervously said hello and acted friendly. Shortly after, I saw a water moccasin. I only knew it was that because two guys near me told me; despite their friendly-sounding name, they are quite poisonous.

At one point, I had to climb a fence. I looked around for the ribbons, thought, "Are you kidding me?" when I saw the ribbons on the other side of the fence. So many times in races when you realize you have to cross streams ("Are the trail markers REALLY over there? Oh no...") it's the same feeling. It wasn't too hard, but it was a little ridiculous around mile 24 (and then you have to climb over it again on the way back!).

I joined up with this nice guy and we chatted a bit, and then we took the wrong way, following some stupid Verizon flags in the ground (instead of the ultra flags, which were almost the same colour).

The worst thing about having a relay at the same time is watching the relay runners blast by you and feeling slow...and when they see you at the aid stations. I was covered with gu, blood, sweat, mud, snot, and eating like a maniac. They stared at me as I inhaled pretzels, peanut M & Ms, snickers, my powerbar chews, gels. "Oh YUM!" It made me aware that I was clearly not normal.

Around mile 32, I saw the hunters again...this time dragging a bloody dead boar. Not the best thing for a vegetarian to see, especially when her stomach is upset.

The race started to get painful - I pushed past the pain and my stomach felt queasy. I ate pretzels, jolly ranchers, forced myself to eat. When you don't eat, then you bonk, and then it's over. It's hard to balance eating with nausea. At one point, I laughed to myself: "Of course I'm nauseous. I'm eating gu and snickers and m & ms and pretzels - that's not the best combination." Not to mention the fact that I was also running at the same time as eating.

The terrain was lovely - very runnable. I've never run so much in an ultra. An aid station mistakenly told me I was second woman (which I doubt, especially when I passed two women in the last ten miles). Still, I pushed forward, passing people.

At a mile to go, I pushed as hard as I could. A relay runner was struggling and his teammate began jogging with him (barefoot). I passed him. His teammates were infuriated. "You can't let her pass you! Get her! You can get her!" No way. I was so determined - I pushed and pushed and grimaced --

and finished!

(I finished ahead of him!)

It wasn't my best 50 miler - 10 hours 16 minutes - but it was a lot of fun. As usual I met all sorts of awesome, wonderful people. I had fun doing what I love most - running. 

After, I learned I was 3rd woman overall, 1st in my age group (To be honest, I was the only one!), and 7th overall. I feel quite good about that!

I highly recommend this race. From what I've heard, other Dances with Dirt races are even harder, but totally fun. When a race is insane, sign me up!

Do I need music to run?

People have asked me repeatedly about if I listen to music when I run. "Not usually." They're shocked...I enjoy the thoughts in my head. Running is my practice, my form of meditation.

I am so distracted - at work, I have coworkers who are chatting in informal meetings, conference calls, to each other, so I'll try to block it out by listening to music or will even listen to NPR for background information while working. At home, while cooking, my cat will be meowing, NPR will be playing, and I might be on the phone. I'm always on the go, with too much technology (post to Twitter, catch up on email, what's the latest on Facebook) - so quiet running is one of the best times for me to clear my mind and relax. Music is great to motivate you and keep you going - but my mind is what gets me out there in the first place.

Some people on the ultra list have been talking abt headphones lately and I found these posts particularly poignant:

From Chris Owens:

"I can't believe you ran X miles, I don't even like driving a car that
far.  Do you listen to music while you run?"
"nope"
"what do you think about while you're running?"
"same things I think about when I'm not running"

From John M:

(Things you can hear when NOT wearing headphones)

Owls from several directions as dusk settled in and hunting areas were
claimed for the evening.
Coyotes after a thunder storm in Palo Duro Canyon.
The waterfall whose presence slowly gained volume for forty minutes before
we rounded that last bend in the trail on the Olympic Peninsula.
The wailing of baby (?) cougars impatient for mom to return.
Those last snorts of a wild boar just before I grabbed a limb to swing into
the nearest tree.
Mockingbirds in the tall grass prairies of Oklahoma.
Footsteps padding along behind, so many many miles.
Wing beats of a Bald eagle lifting off just a few feet away.
Wind rising and falling in the bristlecones at Great Basin.
The silence of Death Valley.
A red-tail hawk startling me with obvious delight screeching on a winter
morn as I crossed "his" frosty field--reminding me I was only a visitor.
Soft voices, murmured greetings and encouragement way far dark in the night.
Seals barking mixed with the bells of the bouys as the waves of an incoming
tide rattled rocks along the beach.
The rumbles of thunder outside of Trinidad as thunderstorms chased us off
the trails of the Rockies and back into Kansas.
Frost breaking as I ran through the knee-high grasses of Chip Ross Park,
rustling loud enough I had to stop to see who was coming up behind me.
T'was just me.
Those many frogs in totally joyous disharmony that went to silence as I
left the woods and started along their pond's edge.
The Rufous hummingbirds: one?  Six?  Three?  I heard, but never saw.
A singly curious Winter wren, one note to play was all he had, but one note
was played again and again as he perched on a branch not three feet from
where I had paused on the way down Mary's Peak.

Run gently out there.

It All Comes Back to Running

After a fairly easy 3 hour trail run during which I felt like hell, I fell asleep in the car ride back to NY. (No, I was not driving!) I came home, showered, ate, puttered a bit, and passed out. I slept a solid 11 hours, dragged myself out of bed for work (late), was fairly useless for 3.5 hours, then left to go back home to sleep. I slept another 3 hours, got up, ate, and passed out for another 10 hours. Then I worked from home, and decided to skip my Tuesday weight lifting/elliptical for 1hour/1 hour run. I needed to rest.

I'm not a creature who likes to rest. It was a little difficult, but I kept busy with relaxing, drinking chamomile tea, catching up. Today, I feel heaps better, and was able to do my Tuesday workout routine no problem (though I know yesterday I would have had great difficulty).

Sometimes it's hard to step back and realize what's best...I know Umstead looms close ahead, and I know the cut-off for a sub-24 100 miler will be very, very tight, and I know, I KNOW if I'm having a good day I can definitely achieve it. The problem is, with running, you never know if you'll have a good day until it happens.

At VT100, I was on target for sub-24 for a while. At mile 70, I was slipping off it a little, but I could see 24-and-change. And well, we all know what happened when my feet had that horrid allergic reaction to the socks...

Iliana and I have been talking about upcoming races. It keeps changing, but I think this will be 2010:

• February 13: Dances with Dirt 50 Miler (Green Swamp, FL)
• March 27-28: Umstead 100 Miler (NC)
• April: Boston Marathon
• May 1: Miwok 100k
• May 8: Bear Mountain (probably not, but I'd love to do the 50 miler)
• May 22: South Mountain 100k (I do love those fatasses, baby!)
• June: Ultimate XC
• July: Maybe, Maybe, Maybe Vermont 100
• August: Possibly pacing Iliana in Leadville!
• August: Burning Man 50k
• October: Javelina Jundred
• November: NYC Marathon (If I'm in the States...)
• December: Agua y Fuego 100k in Nicaragua

It's a pretty tough schedule, and a lot of money in plane fares. I'm hoping I can use my frequent flier miles to go to Nicaragua and/or AZ for Javelina...


So many races, so little time.


How did ultrarunning become such a passion? I think as my last relationship slowly disintegrated, I embraced something that always loved me back (well, except when I was trying not to cry in the bushes in the VT50 or crying during the Watchung 50k blizzard in 2009). It's tough, but running is the one thing I always come back to. I read some old letters I wrote when I was 16 and I was obsessed even then (scarily!). I look around at the mess in my apt - Endurolytes on the bookshelf, a pile of clothes for tomorrow's run at my feet, running backpack next to my Coach bag, my cat snuggling with my wicking socks...my life is full of contradictions, but really....


It all comes back to running.


 

White Hyacinths

If I had but two loaves of bread, I would sell one of them and buy white hyacinths to feed my soul.

--Elbert Hubbard

and the training for the umstead 100 miler continues...

I have to get more serious about things. I've been trying to make sure I do my strength training at least twice a week, preferably three times. I went to yoga tonight - I haven't been in forever and need to be more mindful about my stretching. I'll keep up with my cross-training, upping my mileage smartly, and training through glycogen depletion.

I'm excited and nervous and loving (and sometimes hating) the process.

Why do you run so much?

Lately, as I've been upping my mileage, training harder (lifting 2-3 times per week at the gym), cross-training, and really focusing for my upcoming race, the Umstead 100 Miler. People seem to be more aware of my training because it is taking up more time. ("Sorry I can't meet for drinks that late - I have to be up at 5:30 a.m. for training." "Oh, I've just been busy running lots." "Can we make it after 5p.m.? I'll be running all day...yeah, from 6am through 4pm. Yeah, that long.")

And then I get the inevitable question:

Why do you run so much?

I love it. I love running more than almost anything else. Running is the time in my life when I'm happiest, freest, most alive. Sure, some runs suck (like running a slow half over the weekend in Central Park wasn't fun, nor was a recent 3 hour run in pouring freezing rain), but running is ultimately, at the core of me. It's who I am. It all comes back to running.

Do you have a moment in your life, or something in your life, that makes you feel so amazingly happy? Perhaps when you hold your beloved child. Or waking up in someone's arms that you are in love with. Or while eating a delicious dinner made for you by someone wonderful. Or maybe watching the sunrise or sunset from the beach. Or kissing someone you're in love with (the kind of kissing that makes your knees go weak). Or an airport hug of someone you love so dearly. Perhaps when you were dancing last weekend, or in the midst of Burning Man around wonderful people. Riding your bike? Getting married...all those things might make you feel wonderfully happy - or not.

It's individual, what makes you completely happy. Running is my drug. It makes me happier than anything else. If it didn't, why would I do it so much?

Quote from Sex and the City

“Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free til they find someone just as wild to run with them.”

Meow!

Think from Poets

If the light is the soul then the soul is all around me.

--Nicole Perayfitte

Accept lost forever.

--Jack Kerouac

I must either create my own system or be trapped in another.

--Bhanu Kapil Ryder

The young never think of themselves as temporary.

--Bobbie Louise Hawkins

What is falling in love but drunken acceptance?

--Bobbie Louise Hawkins

I should like to die at your feet and live in your arms.

--Voltaire

Get it when you're alive; you can't find it when you're dead.

--Joanne Kyger

What on earth would kill for love -- who wouldn't?

--Ted Berrigan

I and I'm ab out to be born again thinking of you.

--Ted Berrigan

While my writings may not be exclusively political, they can never be completely private.

--Elene Sikelianos

We could never get enough money and power together to erect a government that cares about its people.

--Jack Kerouac 

In the winter, we have sleeves, but in the summer, we have arms.

--Maureen Owen

Be as thoughtfully fearlessly as you can.

--Rikki Ducornet

If it's not interesting, go somewhere that is.

--Rikki Ducornet

Until a poem is read aloud, it is holding its breath on the page.

--Edwin Torres

Are you ready to fall? Yeah! Then come on in!

--Edwin Torres

Love breaks down the hate to make people listen.

--Mac Wellman 

Speech is

my hammer

bang my

world into

shape

let it fall.

--Mos Def

Keep up the breath that could kill you.

--Jena Osman

Don't be afraid to see something you don't want to see.

--Mei Mei Brussenbruge

Innocence is the standard.

If you are not innocent, you are guilty

Renee Glassman Quote

"Being ruined is a beautiful thing  because it leads you to other places."

Some Quotes from Bobbie Louise Hawkins

"You speak and I hear violins."

"Love is a frenzy and has no limit."

"Love is the fastest and easiest way to get into trouble."

"We don't want a solution; we want to be mystified."

"To prove we mean it, we must go in harm's way."

"You think you know what's what and then you go and fall in love."

"Who remembers all the resolutions after the last romance?"

i fight like a girl

the following was on the back of our take back the night t-shirts many years ago.

i fight like a girl.
i fight like a girl who refuses to be a victim.
i fight like a girl who's tired of being ignored and humored and raped.
i fight like a girl who's sick of not being taken seriously.
i fight like a girl who's been pushed too far.
i fight like a girl who offers and demands respect.
i fight like a girl who has a lifetime of anger and stregnth and pride up in her girly body.
i fight like a girl who doesn't believe in fear and submission.
i fight like a girl who knows that this body and this mind are mine.
i fight like a girl who knows that you have only as much power as you.
i fight like a girl who will never allow you to take more than i offer.
i fight like a girl who fights back.
so, next time you think you can distract yourself from your insecurities by vicitimizing a girl, think again. she may be me, and i fight like a girl.


--stefanie

i guess you can't go short & fast AND long & strong...

There's so many things I LOVE about ultrarunning (great community, eating brownies while running, beautiful trails, hallucinations while running at night, geeking out on gear), but one thing I do not like about ultrarunning:


It's made me a slower runner.


My PR is 1:35 for the half-marathon, 3:28 for the marathon, but I haven't hit either of those times since 2009. (Okay, so we're only a few weeks into 2009, but I ran 3:46 disappointingly in the NYC Marathon this autumn.) I've noticed routes I used to complete in a certain amount of minutes are taking me longer...my legs are tired...I am slower.


I ran 8.5 hours last weekend, felt great the whole time, strong. The longer runs are getting easier. A three hour run is normal. A three hour marathon...well, there's the challenge.


I signed up for Boston, but I don't even know if I'll do it. Health problems indicate a minor surgery will probably be necessary, so if that's the case, I'm hoping to schedule it after the Umstead 100Miler and that way, I can take my 1-2 weeks rest easily and hopefully be ready for Miwok 100k and my crazy May of running! But running NYC last autumn, my shins, my calves, my legs felt so torn up by the pavement.


I want to run fast. I want to keep PR'ing in marathons, half-marathons. I want to run 1:30 half-marathon. I want to break 3:20 for the marathon. I just don't know if ultrarunning and shorter speedier races are possible for me.


My legs have been feeling sore a lot lately. This was part of the result of my crummy half-marathon this marathon -- they ached so badly I couldn't help but slow down -- I couldn't push myself. I am not used to running so fast, as well. Lately, my sore calves have prevented me from doing speed workouts.


I know what I need to do -- more speed. But I don't know if my fast twitch muscles are even around anymore.


I ran into my friend Lynn while running and she cheered me up. We chatted for a while, and she told me, "Cherie, you've done the marathons, the halves. Now do the hundreds, the fifties. You're long now. Focus on that and do it while you can." Lynn is a marathoner, and I am trying to take that advice.


I called my mother, almost crying. I hate being disappointed with my times. "Cher, you're not a shorter, fast runner anymore. You're a long-distance runner. An endurance runner. You can't do both and your body has changed. You're an ultrarunner now."


Thinking about it, I definitely prefer ultrarunning to marathoning. I just wish I could have both.

Can't Get Beyond That

Last night, in the midst of a fun dance party with Midori and glitter flying through the air and matchmaking and dance, dance, dance, I was struck by depression.

When I ran into my best friend from high school while running 3hrs in the pouring freezing rain by Prospect Park and told him about it, he said, "Isn't it funny how a million things are happening and you can't get beyond that one?"

This is a rather strange place for me to be in. I know this is partially a reaction to my ex moving out, but it's more of the fact that I am rethinking my life...what have I done...where am I going...what does this mean...will I ever find love? All those big questions that a lot of people die without ever answering.

My tactic for now is to live life one day at a time...running, cooking, seeing friends, going to dance parties, drinking wine, reading good books, taking things one step at a time, focusing on work...It's somewhat working, but then sometimes the sadness comes (and it's inexplicable; I'm not focused on one thing but it's an overwhelming feeling) and it's hard to move beyond that.

Maybe I'll move to South America in April. Maybe I'll fall in love with a stranger next time I go to my health food store. Maybe I'll win the Umstead 100 Miler. (Least likely of all to occur!) I don't know what is going to happen...I just know I'm going to keep on moving and try to get beyond any kind of sadness.

Watchung 50k

The Watchung 50k was a mixture of cold, pain, cold, fun, and more cold. Temperatures rose to a high of 25 (with real feel temps being colder). I dressed like never before -- tshirt, 2 very warm baselayers, a running winter jacket, and two pairs of running tights. I wore mittens with handwarmers, and a face mask with a hat on over that. It was COLD!

My first 6 miles were painful. Lately, I've been dealing with extreme calf soreness the first 30-45 minutes of every run. I had to keep stopping to stretching the first 4 miles or so.

Eventually, I was warmed up and felt great. I pushed myself whenever I could, and was very careful around the ice. Oh, and there was SO much ice. I wore my Yak Trax, which really helped me stay upright.

The race is 3 loops, with lots of great single track. The trees and bushes were covered with pretty white, and there were some nice sections where you ran next to water. The RD had a big aid station in the parking lot where we started, along with 2 other primarily water stops.

Being fat ass style, conversations were easy, people were friendly, food at the aid station (including whiskey and beer!) was plentiful, and everyone had a cheerful, happy day. There were some hills, some rocky sections, but nothing I couldn't handle.

Around mile 26, my feet really started hurting. I have never worn Yak Trax for so long, and my feet were starting to feel sore and irritated. Indeed, when I took them off, a thick red mark remained across the middle of my foot, and the bottom of my right foot ached like never before.

At times, the white blazes were a little easy to miss (in the white snow!), but I'm proud that I didn't get lost once!

It was a fun race, despite being cold. I warmed up fairly quickly, and did not remove any layers except my ski mask (which got wet with sweat and then froze, yuck). Nutrionwise, I didn't eat enough my second loop, but fueled up before my final loop with some delicious oatmeal cookies and pretzels. The volunteers looked at me as I was crazing as I raved over the deliciousness of the treats, but they really helped me finish strong.

And finish strong I did! I felt happy and accomplished!

ridiculous cold winter

it was fourteen, feels like four, with 40-45 mph wind gusts when i left my house to go running. despite being bundled up, i was freezing. i ran through greenpoint, williamsburg, bed-stuy, crown heights. people stared at me; is she really running? is she crazy? i must've seemed really hot since i got a bunch of yells, cheers, and honks. oh yeah, baby, ski mask sexy.

why i keep going...

everytime i find myself flat on my face, i pick myself up and get back in the race; that's life.

--frank sinatra

how to move forward when all you want to do is sit down and cry

With the wind whipping outside, NPR playing in the kitchen, and a cat sleeping on a suitcase, it is difficult to see where the pain exists. However, when I look over my left shoulder, I see the piles of boxes and wrapped furniture. It is official: he is moving out.

He is my partner since 1999; while we officially broke up several months ago, we have continued to live together (nothing unusual for NYC here). There were periods of horror and pain and anger and not seeing each other for days (He often stayed at his friend's.), but now that it is finally happening, we both are overcome with sadness. Going through things - "I think that's your baking dish;" "You can keep that extra spatula" - we are saddened as we see our future and past crumble away into boxes.

I still am in shock, in a way. I never really thought it would come to this. I mean, for so long I looked forward to the end of pain, the end of the unhappiness (major reasons why we broke up), but now I can't seem to imagine life without him.

Dating in NYC is a mysterious and annoying game. I don't even want to play it right now. I'm sick of the BS and sometimes wish I lived someplace a little simpler. I'm looking forward to getting my new fabulous bed, sitting in it with my cat, doing some knitting, relaxing. I'm looking forward to writing again, starting to send out my novel to agents. I'm looking forward to planning new trips. I'm looking forward to getting my mojo back.

I'm glad I have a lot of good things to propel me forward - some fabulous races coming up (Watchung 50k next weekend, Dances with Dirt 50 Miler in February, Umstead 100 miler in March, Boston Marathon in April, Miwok 100k in May...), some really awesome friends.

My New Year's resolutions are to eat less sweets and do more core workouts. But I also really want to figure my life out - I'd love to save up enough money to quit and travel, but I think that might be a lot longer in the coming than I'd like.

It's the last night of the past of my life. I'm going to head to the gym, and then help T pack and sort through some more stuff. Tomorrow night, maybe I'll go to No Parking on the Dance Floor and dance myself into the future, or maybe I'll sort through things at home and enjoy the sound of silence, or maybe I'll find solace in a good friend with tea. 

I think I have to stop planning things out. I have to stop having 5 year plans. I have to start thinking, "Things are going good now, let's take baby steps."

I know my races. I know I'll be at Burning Man. I know I have good friends to support me. I don't know anything else, but I'm going to enjoy the lovely beautiful small things right now.