07 February 2011

Making Out with Albuterol

Asthma is one of the scariest things. To not be able to breathe...to not be able to get the very foundation of life is awful. The times where I think I may not make it are scary...with asthma, it's all about mind control and when I lose control and panic, I can't breathe and it gets worse and worse...

I think my scariest - not my worst - email was when I was surfing on my birthday a few years. I was enjoying the waves, my birthday, the other surfers around me...it was a weekday, I was off from work and it was a perfect day.

Until I couldn't breathe...and I couldn't think. I could see my spot on the beach, tried to ride the waves in, but couldn't. I kept getting smashed back. Where is my breath? The other surfers around me appeared to not notice. And I tried to paddle and got smashed back. Why couldn't I get in? Why? Where was my breath?

And then I realized I was caught in a rip current. Silly me. I paddled parallel, got out of the rip current, and pulled myself in.

And my inhaler never tasted so good.

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